Our Engagement Story

Thursday, May 28, 2020


It's hard to believe that Andrew and I have already been engaged for a whole year! For as long as I can remember Andrew had said that he didn't want to be engaged while he was in school. In college I remember thinking, totally understandable! Gotta respect priorities, right? But those of you who know him know how this story goes... so two graduate degrees and six years of dating later, we were in summer of 2019. 

I was 100% convinced it was going to happen Memorial Day Weekend. We were a few weeks post-graduation (UNC Law for him, ECU Master's for me) and we were going to see both of our families that weekend. Also, for my job with Alpha Xi Delta, we host an annual summer training program that I help lead; this year it fell the weekend after Memorial Day. I had expressed how nice it would be to attend this event with coworkers and friends I don't get to see that often and be able to share this exciting news with them in person. Well the weekend came and went... and nothing. I couldn't help but be a little disappointed and can admit, even threw a little pity party for myself once we got back home. 

On Tuesday of that week, Andrew was extra nice to me. I mean he's usually a happy guy and amazing boyfriend, but I could tell he was really trying. I spent the day at my apartment packing for my work trip and was so close to just staying at home due to my early flight in the morning. He helped convince me that a nice evening just the two of us would be just what I needed.  

When I opened the door, I could tell he was pulling out all the stops. But, I assumed this was an effort to make me feel better after my pity party. I had, for lack of better words, given up hope it was going to happen before my trip at this point. He had made a charcuterie appetizer, set the table, and was playing his favorite Italian cooking Pandora station - things not totally uncommon in our house, but definitely more special than your typical Tuesday. He was preparing his specialty; homemade meatballs and spaghetti. Honestly the whole dinner was perfect. 

I had absolutely NO idea anything was up... until Andrew asked me to wash the dishes. Prior to living together, our rule was always that if you cook it and it's your house, you clean it. I had always offered to help but he had always said no. So, while I didn't want to get my hopes up again, I knew something was up. When Andrew cooks, he uses nearly every pot and utensil in the house, so while he was off in the other room I began the daunting task of tackling the kitchen. Not too long in my task, I get a tap on the shoulder and turn around to find him on one knee. It wasn't a long speech, but it was perfect in every way. 

I couldn't tell this story without including one of Andrew's favorite parts - the Phillies were on a rain delay. It gave him the perfect window of time to pop the question. Also, when I asked him why he didn't do it earlier in the weekend, he stated that (obviously) he didn't want to tie our engagement to a national holiday honoring our fallen soldiers. Which, in hindsight, is so thoughtful of him and I'm grateful for that.

Some people have wondered about the decision to have a private proposal, rather than an elaborate celebration with our family, friends, and of course, a photographer. While I love planning events, I don't really enjoy being the person the party is thrown for. The idea of people hiding in the bushes and having every moment captured on camera made me nervous that this special occasion would be more of a show than what it was truly intended to be. Andrew and I had discussed this long prior to the engagement and how this preference of mine aligned with his as well. That's not to rag on anyone who had the big party and photographer - while I wouldn't change a single thing about our engagement, I am a little envious that you have the pictures from that moment. However, the biggest upside to our engagement was that we could tell our friends and family on our own time. There was nobody sharing the news before us or people who couldn't attend a celebration - because it was just us two. We spent a little over a week telling people as individually as possible before sharing the news on social media. This time is something I cherish so greatly because it gave us time to celebrate and soak in the moment privately.

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